I Lied…

It took the men in my life approximately 4.5 seconds to start arguing and sniping at each other. Think women are bad? Sheesh. My house is like ‘Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom’ every single freaking day.

Marlin Perkins: “And just look at those two male big horn sheep, preparing to butt heads as they battle for supremacy rights on this hill.”

Jim Fowler (and yes, I had to Wiki the show to remember his name): “Watch carefully. There are two younger sheep just to the left. See them circle the ones butting heads, waiting for a chance to challenge.”

Marlin: “We’ll wait for Jim to join the head-butt contest now so he can measure how far the sheep get thrown back from the impact. Take it away, Jim.”

Jim: “Wait…what? I’m staying in the helicopter, you crazy old coot.”

Head butts or butt-heads? Hmmm…a true conundrum. I do adore these men (and young men) and enjoy being around them. But when testosterone poisoning is involved, all bets are off. I’m clearing out and heading to the nearest Starbucks for an iced coffee. I’m not going to be Jim Fowler.

Those horns could poke your eye out.

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