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Meet Cyd

Hello blog! Hello family! It’s been so long since I’ve been here… almost two weeks. Wow. Let’s Swiffer the place and tidy up a bit – it’s looking a little bedraggled and sad.

All right. Things are now dusted and clean-ish. I’ve had at least three people visit the blog in the last week, which for me is HUGE (and I thank them very much). I’ll now relate to you why I’ve been gone for a while…

In a galaxy far, far away…

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.

Oh, hell. Here’s the real story: I have wimmins problems. First we thought it was the ole baby bucket (uterus). Now it turns out to be the baby makers (ovaries). The final diagnosis is I have a  very large cyst on one ovary that is playing merry hell with me and my lady parts. We don’t think it’s cancerous, but won’t know for sure until it’s removed and biopsied. And so, for the last three weeks I’ve been certain a death sentence awaited me with every lab and doctor visit. Absolutely, positively certain.

Meet the cause of my stress:

Okay, mine is not quite so perky, but I do imagine Cyd the Cyst is blue. He looks more like Oscar the Grouch and he hates it when I stand up quickly. He has been sending telepathic signals to the doctors and the hospital to avoid being removed, which has been very successful for him and not so much for me. Dammit Cyd. Shut the hell up. I want you gone. Kaiser says May. I say ‘no freaking way am I waiting three more months’.

The living room dust-bunnies are waiting for us to start our Friday cleaning but Cyd does NOT want to vacuum. He wants to sit on the couch and watch every episode of Season Two of “Portlandia”. Stupid cyst. Just for that, I’m going to do laundry and see how he likes them apples. HAH!

Lovely to see your faces, and lovely to be back! And please don’t be too welcoming to Cyd. He has a very, very temporary visa to visit the castle. Deportation is in his future – his immediate future.

**Original artwork done at the site linked to the picture. Thanks to them!


2 Responses

  1. Cyd is not welcome. Cyd can leave now. Cyd does not have an invitation back.



  2. Dear Queen,

    Send Cyd to the Tower.

    Hugs and kisses from us Brits.

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