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December Kicketh My Backside

Dear December:

I would like to formally protest the last two weeks. Here is a list of my complaints. Please let me know when they will be addressed:

1) We had almost two weeks of freezing temperatures, and approximately eighteen flakes of snow. Who DOES that? Hmmm? Where’ s my damn snowpocalypse?

2) Oldest sprog’s car died, had to be towed, and then we gave him darling husband’s car.

3) Darling husband’s car died, had to be towed, and then we gave oldest sprog MY car.

4) Both dead cars require extensive repairs, costing thousands of dollars. Please shoot me now.

5) Please don’t really shoot me.

6) Christmas is ten days away. I have 3.5 gifts completed. Help me, Rhonda.

7) Last night the naughtiest Springer Spaniel ate a box of snickerdoodles. Almost a full dozen. She also nibbled on a bag of coffee beans. She better not have anything worse than a sugar/caffeine buzz, since I’m spending all of our savings fixing cars.

8) Why is being a grown-up SO HARD?????

2013-12-09 17.32.16On the up side, thank you for the Christmas tree, and for the ornament that looks  just like Grandpa Vale playing the banjo. Yes, I know it’s from ‘Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer’. Yes, I know it’s modeled after Burl Ives. But it’s MY grandpa. It is. Ask around.

Mary-92Of course, now I can’t find the picture I’m thinking of, only this one. Imagine him older and a little chubbier, wearing a vest, with a van dyke, and a twinkle in his eye you could see from space. THAT’S my grandpa. *sniff* I miss him.

2013-12-12 07.18.19*ahem* Sorry. Oh, this was pretty, too.

I’d like a specific time frame for my complaints to be dealt with, and the name of your supervisor, in case you don’t follow through. And now I’m off to the Oregon Food Bank to help bag up food for people who can’t afford…


Never mind.

Thank you for the sunrises. Thank you for my grandpa. Thank you for crispy-cold winter weather. Thank you for the frost fairies. Thank you for everything.

December, you’re my favorite.

Loads of love and smooches and hugs and candy canes and fir trees and kittens and unicorns –

Julie the grateful



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